Mr. So Damn Right

Sometimes....Damn is all I can say about this man...love his eyes, his smile (whenever he do smile) his dimples, love how he keeps his hair cut, and his beard trimmed just right around his lips...his lips....Mmmmmmmmm his lips. This man has THE softest, sexiest lips I have ever kissed. I just want to linger on them, savor them, I can't get enough of them...when I kiss him, I feel like I can kiss him forever...sucking on that bottom lip just hard enough to get a rise out of him, but soft enough to tease him. The first time I kissed him, I remember like it was yesterday, wanted him right there in his truck, wanted to feel more than his lips....but I had to conduct myself in a lady like manner and not in that whorish, slutty way that I was feeling at that time...damn, went home soaking wet that night. It would be almost a month before that night came around and I couldn't take it no more. We was at a party...me and another girl got there first...him and his boy came alittle later. We went to our trucks to get something to drink, they were sitting in his truck, talking, but something told me, HE was looking, was maybe secretly liking what he was seeing....I knew I was looking cute, threw the extra little switch in the hips...just in case, lol. He blew his horn at me as if I was a trick looking for a treat...walked over to see what he wanted...could smell his cologne before I even leaned in...he wanted some of what I was drinking...poured him some, went back into the party, the whole time I'm thinking about him. He finally comes in, surprisingly I got him to take a few pics with me...then kind of went our own way, I watched him, working the room, cool as hell...his demeanor was making me want him more...after a few hours and a few more drinks, I left, was a tad bit tipsy was walking in some 5 inch heels....texted him to let him know I was going back to my room...he text back, "Ok, I'll be there in a bit". I got to my room, showered, threw on a tee and some panties, laid across the bed...waiting for his arrival...dozed off a bit and almost missed him......but...I didn't :-) He came in, we chatted alittle, laid on the bed, next thing I knew, we were kissing, I had those lips again, damn, damn, damn was what I was thinking....I could feel him pressing up against my stomach, me getting wet, off came his shirt, then the belt was undone, jeans unzipped...he pulled out that fat, swollen dick of his, started rubbing it against my clit thur my panties, my pussy getting wetter by the milliseconds...finally he said, take these off, damn near taking my panties off in one movement....my thighs automatically opened wider on their own, waiting this sexy caramel skinned man to be deep in between then....he continued to rub his now fully erect dick against my clit, making moans escape out my mouth, I felt like I was losing control....it got to the point where I couldn't take it no more, I moved my hips enough to make him slide deep into me, I caught my breath....damn he was feeling good as fuck!!! He stroked my pussy nice and deep 10 good times and I started cumming all over him, waves of orgasms hitting me with every stroke....started calling his name, getting louder the more he fucked me, harder and deeper til I felt him explode inside of me.....this man had awaken things in me that had to be hibernating before he got in there...he laid down, but I wanted more of him, had to taste him...so I started laying a trail of kisses down the center of his stomach, loving how he was jumping alittle from my touch....kissing til I got to that tool of mass destruction...slowly trailing the tip of my tongue down the length of it, letting the ball of my tongue ring roll against him til I got to the tip of his dick, teasing a bit with the tip of my tongue before taking him deep in my mouth all the way to the back...hearing him moan just alittle. I'm feeling him growing inside of my mouth, stretching it til it couldn't no more. In and out, I'm enjoying sucking his dick, loving the response I'm getting from him to the point that its turning me on...I reach down and start playing with my still swollen, wet clit...slipping 1,2, then all 4 fingers deep inside of me. I dont know which one of us gave in but next thing I know, I'm straddling him, one move and he was in me again, feeling like he fitted me like custom made glove. He grabbed my hips, he pushed deeper inside me. I could feel myself cumming all over this man again, running from my lips and splashing all over his balls. The harder he thrust inside of me, the more I moaned, starting calling his name again, leaned against him just enough to get some extra leverage...that pushed him deeper. I lost control of everything....this man knew exactly what he was doing...I came again...3 more times to be exact before I felt those fireworks again. I swear he was warming me up from the inside out...I laid next to him...wore the hell out but beyond satisfied....he was more than I expected...but I enjoyed every single second of him. To be quite honest, I thought that would be the first and last night between us....but I was wrong...dead wrong...I kept going back to him over and over again, would get excited as hell when I knew I was going to see him. Things started developing between us, feelings started getting involved, next thong I know, I had fell in love with him...wasn't sure how he felt about me at that time. As time progressed and we got closer, I found out how he felt. Will never forget the first night he told me he loved me...."Don't let this go to your head" he texted me..."but I do love you, not yet in love, but its coming". All I could do was smile....eventually a few months down the line, I got him to admit he had fallen IN love with me...we were finally on the same page. Don't get me wrong, I've questioned him quite a few times on whether his love for me was real...pissed him off in the process but I got the answer I wanted. Now its been well over a year that we've been together. He's changed so much and so have I.....for each other. I love him with everything in me, will do damn near anything for him. That's my baby, my heart, my love...My King. He knows that no matter what, thur thick or thin I'm going to be by his side. I know he feels the same way about me. I can honestly say, WE love EACH OTHER...and that's the most beautiful feeling in the world....Now, the question is....is this a real story or have LõKee tapped into the dark recesses of her mind??? She will ALWAYS keep you guessing ;) Good night fellow bloggers!!!!

Confused.....

Never thought I would fall in love again...got so tired of feeling unappreciated...as if how I felt didn't matter...as if what I wanted was no longer of any importance...all I've ever wanted was a man who would love me, just as hard and as much as I loved him and be real and true about his love for me...maybe that's what's wrong with me, I love too hard, I try to please that one man, treat him like a king, but in the midst of it all, I'm being treated like the Court Jester....am I not worth being loved and respected? Do I look that bad to men that they feel like I'm not deserving of being loved? I mean truly, deeply, genuinely, and sincerely being loved? Never thought I was a "Dime Piece'', but didn't think I deserved to be hidden in the dark corners and recesses of anyone's mind. I always thought I was a good woman, one that any man would love to have by his side...but as time goes on, I'm starting to think that maybe all the thoughts I have of myself have been diluted...maybe after all these years, I don't know what I'm doing and that's the reason why I'm treated the way I am....as if I have the words "Welcome" across my forehead...I've been lied to, cheated on, hurt so badly to the point where I have curled up into a ball and cried for days...deep down inside, there's this beautiful, loving woman, who's longing to break free, to have that one man in her life who won't hurt her, will love her genuinely and unconditionally...I think she has broke free and found "The One"...but deep down, there's this feeling she can't shake...as if once again she's going to be the one heart broken, lied to and cheated on, because she feels like she's not pretty enough, sexy enough, shapely enough to be on, in or around his arms...BUT....sometimes I just think he's not ready for a woman like her, one that will love him, take care of him, be faithful to him even after she's proven to him that she's only for him, always be there when he calls, be that woman that he knows he wants and needs, but he just don't know how to treat and keep her...deep down I think he knows that this woman loves him....like he wants to be loved.....

One Fucked Up Excuse For A Mother And Grandmother

***Disclaimer....some of what I'm about to write might seem unreal to those of you fortunate enough to read this. These words that are about to flow from my head is things that have been in me for years. I'm about to let you deeper into LoKee's World....if you feel you cant handle it, then bow out gracefully, I won't even be mad. I don't know how much I'm about to let out tonight, might be alittle, might be alot***


How can you call yourself a mother? A grandmother? You have two children and only give a shit about one. Two grandkids and don't care about none. Years of going through this shit, you always making a difference between me and my sister has done nothing but destroyed me. I never thought a mother could do the things to her child that you have done to me. Granted Im not going to sit here and say that I have been the perfect poster child for good behavior, I have raised my share of hell. But there is so much that you have done to me in my life that I know damn well I didnt deserve.

I think you have despised me from the moment I was born...because I look like the man YOU choose to lay down with...that shit wasnt my fault, I didnt come to you and tell you to pick him. I didnt ask you to bring me into this world. Your duty as a mother was to nuture and care for me, make sure I stayed on the right path and made something great out of myself. But instead of you doing that, you always degraded me telling me I would never be shit, just like my daddy.

Did you not know how much that hurt to hear my mother, the woman who birthed me, say those harsh words to me, a child no more than 7 or 8??? Did you not know that those words alone was the foundation of destruction for me? Apparently you didnt, you didnt care about how I felt, what happened to me or anything else.

There are so many things that I remembered that you did to me or allowed to be done to be, its one of the reason why I have a few fears now....me the one that has always been fearless...so I thought. Its funny how things you do in your adulthood triggers those fears from your childhood that you thought was long gone and forgotten.

I've been burned, beaten, knocked unconscious, mistreated and abused...but through all of this, I managed to become a strong woman, stubborn as hell but still standing strong no matter what gets thrown my way.

I pray that I be a much better mother and grandmother than you will ever be. I pray that I turn into something far better than what you turned out for me. My kids and grandkids and great grands if I'm blessed enough to be here, will love me, because I will love them, will never make a difference out of either of them. You should slap the shit out of yourself for wishing anything but the best for your kids. That just goes to show you that every woman is not cut out to be a mother....To be continued....

Him.....Part 2 Continued from Sunday

Do all the things I love to have done to me. He continued to play with my pearl until I couldn't take it no more...had me reaching and grabbing for his head, wanting to push his face deeper inside of me, to ensure he would catch and taste every last drop of my sweet river that was flowing out of me.

I thought to myself, this can't be happening, this man can't possibly have me laying here screaming into a pillow, breathing hard, head spinning, reaching for things that wasn't there, body trembling from him tasting the most intimate part of me, wanting to him to give me more.

Before I knew it, he was over me, looking into my eyes, something I have never let any man before him do. It was like he was looking into my soul, seeing who I really was, seeing any pain that was lurking in the shadows, seeing all the hurt I'd been through...he seen me.

He entered me so smoothly, like a hot knife through butter, made me catch my breath alittle because he had entered territory that hadn't been touched right in a minute. I molded to him as if I was constructed to hold him, and him only.

Our bodies moved in unison, my legs wrapping around his waist, pulling him deeper inside of me, noises escaping from my lips that I hadn't heard in so long, my body responding to him in ways that seemed so foreign to me..."baby, baby, baby", I whispered to him as the waves of orgasms overtook me, "please don't stop, go deeper, deeper, oh yes! yes! yes!".

He knew just what to do to keep the room spinning, took his time, didnt rush, locked my hands in his, kissed me in the sweetest way, his lips soft against mine, pressed his body closer to mine with each burst of passion that flowed between us. This....is the man I have always longed for...one that know what a woman needs without her saying a word to him, one who is confident with himself that he KNOW he will please that woman beyond her wildest dreams.

As the night went on, we made love that second time, intimate, sensual, deep...not sure if he knew it, but it brought tears to my eyes, had never been made love to like that before.He did things that most men won't do because they are afraid it will discredit their manhood...but not Him,he held me to him, rubbed my back, kissed me like I was the only woman on this earth...He has got to be a dream, one that I damn sure don't want to wake up from.

The third time, I think we needed to assure ourselves that we wasn't dreaming, that the sparks that was flying between us was real, that I was real, that he was real...

Tonight wasn't about him, it was about me, about us...it was about satisfying me, making me feel like the woman I had lost so many years ago. Waking up that desire that had burned so brightly in me at one time...he managed to light that flame and stoke the fire so it would burn bright once more...to Him I say thank you...thank you for awaking that desire in me, for letting me feel how a man is suppose to make love to a woman...how he's suppose to treat her...

Damn.....I need more nights like this

Him....

The very first time I laid eyes on him, I think I stopped breathing for a few seconds...

He had these eyes that looked like pools of melted milk chocolate, this smile that could stop anyone and anything in their tracks, that stocky, but yet strong build of a man that made me want to squeeze and touch him all night long. That complexion that made you want to lick this man til your tongue went raw. He made you want to give it up to him right then and there, but you had to hold your composure since you was in a room full of people...

This is the kind of man that has "The Voice" the one if he whispered sweet nothings in your ear, your panties would be soaked instantly. He got the sexy ass southern drawl to it, nice and mellow when he wants it to be, low and seductive when he's teasing the hell out of you, alittle strong and aggressive when he's hitting those spots.

This man knows what to do when he's in the bedroom...knows how to kiss, where to kiss and when to kiss you just right. He knows what I want the minute we see each other...I want those lips against mine, those hands grabbing my ass and lifting me up to wrap my legs around his waist...him throwing me on the bed, taking off my jeans, moving my panties aside with his teeth and burying his head between my chocolate thighs.

He knows where to go, teasing me with his tongue along the way, making me beg him to go there, but he won't, not until he's ready, not until he has me flowing just the way he likes. His fingers slip inside of me, feeling my pussy tightening, exploring my soft pink folds, before he presses that thick tongue softly against my clit, making me arch up to him, wanting him to play with it, suck on it....TO BE CONTINUED.....

Untitled For Now....

I never thought I would fall in love again. But somehow you managed to come in and steal a piece of my heart. The only thing about that is...I'm not sure you know what to do with it.

At times its fragile, and it causes me to show that softer, more feminine side of me...a side that doesn't come out too much because I have been hurt so many times before because of it, a side that alot of people can't handle or take for granted.

Other times its cold as ice, making me have that uncaring attitude, where I could care less about anything and anyone. That "I don't give a shit about you because you don't give a shit about me" attitude.

I'm not that kind of person...never really have been. But through the years I have opened up and let someone into my world and they have came in and crushed it, made me feel so meaningless and very unwanted, not appreciated and definately not loved.

Sometimes I sit back and wonder if its really worth all of this? Is it worth me shedding so many tears? Is it worth me feeling like my heart is breaking in a million pieces? Is this the kind of attention I deserve? Or do I deserve someone that's really going to take my best interest to heart? These are some of the questions I ask myself, sometimes weighing the pros and cons of things. Alot of the times I come up with more pros than cons...other times I just want to say forget it.

The few times that I felt like saying forget it...my heart stepped in and overpowered what my brain was thinking. Sometimes thats when you can tell that what you're feeling for a person is real, that you're not fooling yourself.

But at the same time, what do you do when you feel like that affection is not being returned to you? I think the fear of never being loved the way I not only deserved to be loved, but want to be loved will never happen. That I will continue in this chaotic world searching for that one thing that I feel I am so much deserving of.....pure, unconditional LOVE......

Always

I ALWAYS thought I would have this perfect life...perfect job, perfect man, perfect house, perfect kids. But it didn't turn out that way.

I ALWAYS thought that I would be this person that everyone loved, cherished, enjoyed being around, but that didn't work out the way I had planned either.

I ALWAYS thought I knew how to love, how to appreciate that one person who deserved it, show my love and affection to him in ways he only dreamed of..the problem wasn't me though, it was.....him.

I ALWAYS thought that if I was the "good little wife" that he would love me...the way I once loved him...that he would ALWAYS be my shelter in the middle of any storm....but it didn't work out that way.

One day I had to open my eyes and realize one thing....that I can't ALWAYS please someone, that I can't ALWAYS make someone love me the way I love them... that I can't ALWAYS forget about me just to make them feel better about themselves. That I needed to break free from the monotonous path that I had chosen so long ago...

It was time to start trying to ALWAYS think about me first...do a lot of the things that I ALWAYS wanted to do. ALWAYS love me and not expect another to do so. I have given so much of my love...that I NEVER get back as much as I give...I've ALWAYS seemed to attract the nonchalant ones...the ones who want you to ALWAYS break your neck for them, but will not break a nail for you.

This is just a piece of what's going on in my head....not necessarily true, but not necessarily false either....more to come soon...